Wednesday, March 31, 2010


Memorial weekend is only 58 days away! And I'm nowhere near what I want to look like before I attempt a bikini! As you may have noticed, I haven't posted anything about P90x since my first post about it. That's because I don't really know what happened to that...We got busy with something a few weeks into it and we're having a hard time getting back into it. And the fact that I'm worried about working out too hard while were going through the IUIs is a problem too. But I figured if I can just take control of my calorie intake and limit my snacking for a few weeks and do a little exercise every day, I should get a little closer to bikini presentable without being too ashamed!

I have stuck to my diet every day this week (yes, I'm aware that it's only Wednesday, but I usually fall apart by Tuesday!). I'm not on a certain diet, just keeping track of my calories and making sure I at least walk or run 2 miles every day. I have found a few simple meals that fit into my daily calorie intake needed to lose a few pounds and I feel like I can do this, for a few weeks anyway... But one of my biggest problems is the tempting new vending machine at work. The old machine had really random crap in it and nothing ever really looked appealing, but this one is fulling stocked with everything!

(By the way, this is another picture taken with my crappy iPhone camera but edited with the TiltShiftGen app)

So everyone, please keep me in your thoughts and give me the strength to overcome this evil machine!!!

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Catching up...

I was so busy at work yesterday, I didn't get a chance to even think about updating my blog from this weekend. It was a good busy and I actually liked it.

We had a really busy weekend. Saturday morning I got up and went to my first photography class. More on this later, but I just want to say that I really liked it. Some of the people in the class were completely annoying and I feel like they wasted a lot of time in the class so that kind of frustrated me. They should have taken the slower version of the class and not the accelerated version! But I did learn a few things about my camera that I didn't already know about and I really liked the teachers. I have 2 assignments that I have to complete before my next class this Saturday and I hope to get them done by tomorrow because I'm afraid it's going to be yucky outside after Wednesday. I also have a big project due on the last day of class that I've already started working on. It's a photo scavenger hunt. I have to go around and find 15 different specific things to take pictures of. I'll post all of my pictures as soon as I can.

After my class, I came home and got David and we headed to OKC to help my parents get their house ready to go up for sale. They are moving to the lake! They're almost done with the house and are planning to put it up for sale in the next week or so. My job was cleaning carpets and it wore me out! We went out to eat and to see my nephew Shane and then back to their house to clean more carpet. We got up early Sunday morning and did a few other things around the house and we were back on the road by 10:30 to head to David's soccer game. I dropped him off and went home to start cleaning my own house. I got in the cleaning mood when I started picking up a few things and I was busy all day and didn't get to sit down until after 7:00 pm! I was so exhausted, but I slept sooooo good.

Friday, March 26, 2010

Fav Celeb Pic of the day

Ok, so some of you probably will just think this is the stupidest thing ever, but I like it and it's my blog! I've decided that when I don't really have anything going on or have anything exciting to post, I'm just going to post random crap. And today, I'm posting my favorite celebrity picture. And if anyone really knows me, they know that I love to look at and read about celebrities!

This is Kourtney Kardashian and I LOVE her! I think she is definitely the cutest of the Kardashian's because she is so little and has the best style. I love this outfit she was wearing this week. She just had a baby in December and she knows exactly the right stuff to wear to make her look amazing!

Thursday, March 25, 2010

My new iPhone apps

Yesterday, I discovered 2 new iPhone apps that I'm now obsessed with. The first one is called TiltShiftGen. This app is for people that love to take pictures but hate getting stuck capturing the moment with your iPhone camera. We all know how HORRIBLE the picture quality is when you use your camera phone. Well, this app fixes that problem! It allows your crappy camera phone to create pictures that look like they were taken with an SLR camera.

Ok, so this picture was actually taken with my DSLR camera last weekend...

I sent the picture to my phone and edited it with the new app and this is the result...

So to prove my point about changing up the picture quality from a picture actually taken with my iphone, here is a before picture I took of the coffee cup on my desk...

And after editing with the TiltShiftGen app...



The other app is called iCamcorder and it records video. I have an iPhone 3G, not a 3GS. And if you have an iphone, you know that the 3G does not have video, so this app makes an exception for us! The video quality is very grainy, but you can still make the stuff out. And it has volume. I think it's a pretty good app for being free! You can even email you video, or send it to your facebook account. I haven't created a useful video yet, so I haven't had the chance to test out the Facebook option.

Monday, March 22, 2010


Saturday was the official "1st Day of Spring". So of course it snows, right? So weird to wake up to a blizzard going on outside when the day before was over 70 degrees and so pretty!

The snow did stop in time for me to go to the Black Eyed Peas concert though. Earlier in the day, everyone was having problems on the roads. But they seemed to clear up by 6:00 when we left the house. David drove me and Sarah to the concert and him and Matt planned on staying downtown to watch the basketball games and then come pick us up afterwards. Here are a few pictures I took before we left...

Matt & Sarah

Here are some pictures from the concert...

Sarah, Rachel, & I

Black Eyed Peas


Ludacris and LMFAO opened up for them. So fun!

The whole night was so much fun and I'm so glad I went. I really needed to have fun and be happy.

Friday, March 19, 2010


I'm so thankful for all of the wonderful friends and family we have supporting us through this. I've received several emails and text messages from people making sure I'm ok.

Yesterday, I was so surprised when I got flowers from my bestie Sarah.

Aren't they so pretty?!?! It was so thoughtful and it definitely made me smile and I feel like it just changed my whole mood. And we also made plans to go to the Black Eyed Peas concert this Saturday, so that gave me something to really look forward to! I'm so excited. Except, the news keeps talking about a blizzard coming our way on Saturday! I really hope not! We were supposed to head down to OKC to help my parents with getting their house ready to sell. But now we are worried about going because of the snow. I might still try to make it down there on Sunday if the roads aren't bad.

Also, it's amazing to me how some people are even keeping up with my schedule and know when we should be getting our results and stuff like that. For example, David's boss and his wife have had a little bit of fertility problems also. They already have one little girl, I think she's around 5 or 6 years old. But his wife was really wanting another one and they have been trying for a while. I've learned that's called Secondary Infertility, when you already have had a child but are having problems trying to conceive again. Anyway, they were even going to the same doctor that David and I are going to. They have not done an IUI or anything like that, but were maybe planning on it soon. They recently found out that she's pregnant! It's very early in the pregnancy and they really haven't told anyone. But David's boss came and told David about it because he didn't want us hearing it from someone else. They have been so sweet about finding out how everything is going with us and very supportive when we get bad news. His wife, that doesn't even know me, reminds him when I should be finding out our results. I think it's so nice to have people that don't even know us that well still thinking about us during this time. I'm also really glad that David has someone he can talk to about all of this. Someone that kind of knows how he feels and what it's like to constantly have to take off work to go to the doctor appointments and how it feels putting up with a frustrated and hurt wife.

I have to give David a lot of credit for how he handles this. I know I don't tell him enough how much I appreciate him and everything he does for me. I know that all of these medications and treatments and negative results have really made me a crabby, awful person to deal with at times. I know that this is incredibly hard for him to, but he is being strong for me. I know I yell at him and tell him that he can't possibly know how I feel because he isn't the one having to be poked at all the time and he isn't the one going through ultrasounds twice a month and his hormones aren't going crazy because of all the medication. I tell him that he can't possibly be as hurt as I am because I'm the one that can't get pregnant. The truth that I've realized is that we are both going through this, together. And just because he doesn't show it the same way I do, I know he is just as hurt and frustrated. So I need to thank him for being strong and putting up with me and my craziness. I love you so much and I can't wait to see you as a daddy.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

More bad news

Yesterday was a pretty bad day for me. I had an appointment to go in for a blood pregnancy test to see if the IUI worked. But while I was getting ready in the morning, I started my period. So I knew it was going to be negative before I even took the test. I was automatically in the worst mood ever. The drive to the doctor's office was horrible. Every driver pissed me off and got in my way. I felt like I had smoke coming out of my ears. And then I had to go in the doctor's office and listen to the nurses tell me "Good luck! We'll call you with the results by noon!" I just wanted to shout, "Whatever!"

Then I had to come into work. I didn't feel like seeing anyone, talking to anyone, or even just smiling at anyone. I didn't have the energy to pretend that everything is ok with me because it's not! My boss knows all about what's going on because I obviously have to miss so much work for doctor's appointments all the time. So she came in as soon as I got here to ask how everything went. I had to explain to her that it was just a blood test and that I won't know the results until later. I didn't share that I already started my period. And she says "I just know you're pregnant. You just have that glow! And I knew it when the last girl here was pregnant before she told anyone. I just know you are!" Ummm, ok. That didn't help.

So I get the call that I already knew was coming. And the nurse tells me that this time we are going to try different medicine. The last 2 IUIs were done with me taking Clomid for 5 days and then a trigger shot right before ovulation. This time she said that the doctor wants to do another medicine called Femara for 5 days instead of the Clomid. Then after the 5 days, I would be taking a daily injectable shot of Follistim for 4 days. Then I would come back for my ulstrasound to see how many follicles had developed and determine when I should take the trigger shot. So even though I was extremely upset about the negative results, I did start to get excited about the idea of trying something different.

I cried several times during the day yesterday. I should be used to this by now, but each I still fill like maybe something will be different this time and we will actually get to hear good news. I thought this time that I would actually get to take a pregnancy test and it be positive. But again, the same word just repeats itself over and over in my head, FAILURE.

I read more of my book last night to try to find ways to make myself feel better and to see some good out of the day. And the chapter I had gotten to seemed perfect for what I was going through at that exact moment. The book says "As a woman being treated for infertility, you somehow have to 'expect the worst while hoping for the best.' And that can be incredibly difficult. When you undergo infertility treatment, you have to psyche yourself up so much to endure the medications, to live with the side effects of hormone treatment, to bear the constant blood tests and ultrasounds and injections. You have to get excited about it, because that's the only way you can push yourself to slog through the process. The problem is, when you psyche yourself up like that, when you put so much time and energy into doing a high-tech cycle, you also set yourself up for a huge crash if it fails." This described exactly what I was feeling yesterday. I tried so hard to be positive and not dwell on what would happen if it didn't work this time. I even started looking at baby stuff again and dreaming about nurseries. I knew better than that. That won't happen again. I have made a promise to myself that I will not be involved in any more baby stuff until I get a positive test result.

So that was yesterday. I thought today would be better. Nope, just as bad. I had an appointment this morning for a routine baseline ultrasound to check to make sure that all of my follicles had gone away and that no cysts were left behind. Remember, last time we did the IUI, I had 1 cyst and had to sit out for 2 months while taking birth control to try to get rid of it. Well, my ultrasound shows that I have 4 cysts. Not 1, not 2, but 4!!!!!!! That means that every single one of my follicles that developed this last time did not go away. And more than likely, that means that none of the 4 follicles even released an egg to be fertilized. So, I have to sit out another month while taking birth control and just hope that all 4 cysts are gone by the time my next period starts. And since there are 4 of them, the nurse was going to ask the doctor if she could give me some stronger medication that I would only have to take for 5 days instead of the birth control. I'm waiting to hear back from her about that.

So even though it's very disappointing that the cysts are there, it's the Clomid that's causing them. And remember when I asked the doctor how often does this happen? And she told me that it should only happen 1 out of every 10 times? Well it's happened 2 out of 2 times for me. The doctor wasn't there for me to talk to her about that. I was only dealing with the nurse. But the good news is that when the cysts are gone and we can do the next IUI, I'll be taking different medication and I won't have to take the Clomid. So maybe that will help with that.

This is extremely frustrating and hard to deal with. But there isn't anything I can do about it.

And on top of all of this, some stupid kids decided to ring our door bell at midnight last night and then run away. And then when we got up this morning, we discovered that they had shot paintball guns at our house and we now have blue paint stains on our house and garage! They also rang the door bell on Sunday night and ran away. We are so mad!!! We know where they live though because the idiots were outside this weekend playing with their paintball guns during the day. So David is going over to their house tonight to tell their parents and demand that they clean it up. I mean, WTF?!?! Why would someone do that? Oh, and they pushed over the infamous porta potty across the street.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Monday, March 15, 2010

Weekend Project

We spent our weekend working on a new flower bed for the front yard. We started on Saturday and yesterday we planted plants. I bought flowers too, but everyone is now saying it's too early to plant them (then why is Home Depot selling them now?!?!), so I'm going to wait a little while before I do that.

I think he's annoyed that I take pictures of everything now...

Did you notice that the porta potty is still there?!?!

A few months ago we bought some solar lights on clearance at Target. I thought they would be perfect because they match our outside lights already. They turned out a little bigger than I expected but we only paid $7 for a box of 4, so you can't beat that! We haven't had the chance to turn them on yet because it was cloudy all weekend and today, so we don't know what they look like at night. We might have too many out there and we might have to take some down. I have a feeling the little planes might mistake us for the airport next to our neighborhood!



I think it turned out really good!

At least the front of the house doesn't look plain anymore.

Friday, March 12, 2010

New chairs!

My new chairs for the front porch were delievered on Monday and David put them together, but I'm just now getting pictures of them because I haven't had the cushions on them because of the chance of rain all week.

I think they look really good and I'm so glad the porch isn't completely bare anymore! I'm planning on getting some kind of plant for the table and some other plants to put on the porch too.

We're planning on working on the flower bed this weekend. I want to extend the flower bed that's in front of the window to where it wraps around the sidewalk all the way to the driveway, so there will be a flower bed on both sides of the walkway. Does that make sense? I can't wait to get some more stuff planted in there too. I'm not crazy about the bushes we have right now but I think they will look better if we trim them down and add some other greenery and flowers in there. I'm just so jealous of our neighbors because they had their yard professionally landsaped when we moved in last fall. I really hope we do a good job on ours! Hopefully I'll have pictures by Monday of the progress.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

The longest week ever!!!

I'm trying to be really patient and wait for my pregnancy test on Tuesday, but it's only Thursday! And each day seems longer than the one before!
This past Tuesday I had a blood test done to check my progesterone levels. This level determines the thickness of the wall, and the thicker the better because it makes it easier for a fertilized egg attach and implant. My level was above 20, which is good! The nurse said that since during both IUIs I had a number above 20, I won't have to do the progesterone test again if we have to do another IUI after this one.
This waiting is driving me crazy and I really want to go running to get some of this anxiety and stress out! But I'm afraid to run because I don't want to do anything too strenuous because if something went wrong, I would be second guessing everything I did. I have been trying to walk every day, sometimes even twice a day. So that helps. I really like my walks after work with David the best. It's a way for us to catch up on stuff instead of trying to talk to each other in front of the tv. And we take the dogs to try to wear them out so they aren't running all over the house all night.
Another way I'm keeping busy is by playing Words With Friends on my iphone. I'm totally addicted and it makes my boring days at work go by a little faster. I highly suggest getting involved with this if you have an iphone. It's Scrabble and you can play with people you know or random strangers that are online. I've never played Scrabble before, but I LOVE this! My username is taralyndun!

Monday, March 8, 2010

Busy weekend!

On Saturday, I co-hosted a baby shower for my friend Chelsea. There were tons of people there and she got lots of good stuff! I think it was a really good shower and I think she really liked it.

I made this sign for the shower. I think it turn out pretty good.

And here it is hung up at the shower...

Yesterday, David worked on the tree in the backyard. The tree has a lot of dead branches and all kinds of stickers everywhere. It's not that great of a tree but it's the only one we have so I'm not letting him cut it down!
So I went outside (after I spent the entire day cleaning the house), and played with my camera and tried to figure out the right settings for outdoor pictures.

And of course, I had to take some pictures of the dogs outside...